Several years ago, after life went to heck in a handbasket, Ken and I made some decisions about trying to give back. After all, I had been given the gift of life - a kidney transplant, and Ken had survived major brain damage caused by his attempt to commit suicide (had been declared brain dead, woke up in end of life care). Ken began working (volunteering) at First Street Mission and assisting anyone who needed help; I volunteered to teach computer skills classes to at-risk women trying to develop marketable skills. We also began having tough, tough family issues and had no idea how to resolve them. But we decided that no matter how tough it got that we would do our very best to continue to do the right things to the best of our ability no matter how bad it got. It's been a true test.
After talking about it last night and today, we know that the right thing for us to do is to be absolutely sure that the gifts we have for the kids and grandkids get to them. These are our children...forever and always. And we love every one of them. And no matter what the situation is, we are going to do our best to do the right thing - whether its birthday and Christmas gifts, or help when its needed. Ken delivered the things for his son's family to his dad's house so that they could be picked up. And we are going to take everything possible out of both our cars and try to load all the packages for the rest of them into the two vehicles and take them to the kids. Hopefully we'll be allowed to drop them off. For us it's the only right thing to do. We don't want to fight; we don't want to upset anyone or be the cause of any strife. And we are sorry if we have caused anyone one moment of stress. We certainly didn't mean to.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Sunday, December 29, 2013
December 29, 2013
Haven't posted in a while...laziness I guess.
I went to the Cranky Treadlers Retreat in Lone Oak the weekend of 19-22 September. This is so much fun. I drove by myself this time - because I have to take so much stuff. Two machines - a Singer 99 handcrank and a Singer 66 Lotus handcrank. Plus luggage filled with cutting mats, fabric, projects, iron, tv tray for ironing pad, luggage with clothes and personal hygiene products, and food. This was a 4-day event, so needed quite a bit of "stuff."
The first day we spent setting up our individual nest areas, and then started in working on our various projects. I spent the first day sewing fence rail blocks together - I had made them at a previous retreat. It didn't take long for that. Then I started in making binding for the quilt I should have had finished months ago. I got that applied when I got home.
On the second day we loaded up in 3 cars and headed for Mineola to quilt shops. It was rainy, awful. We were about halfway there when a passenger in my car opened up vials of essential oils. Thought I was going to wreck the car...my throat started closing over, eyes started stinging, breathing became difficult. We made it through the quilt shops (one is very tiny but wonderful fabrics and prices) and then headed downtown to a place that has fabulous burgers/food. I had a wonderful steak sandwich - the biggest thing I've ever seen! (I took half of it back for supper!)
By the time we got back to the retreat center I was feeling terrible. And kept getting worse throughout retreat. I managed to stay until the morning of the 4th day and then packed it up and drove home. I managed to be home that night but Ken gave me a choice the 2nd day. He either called an ambulance to come get me or I could get in the car and he would take me to the ER. I let him take me. I was in anaphylactic reaction. Lucky me, while there the ER doc also noticed my left leg...red, inflamed, swollen. Said it looked like I had a blood clot. Oh joy! What else???? They did a doppler, found no blood clot (thank you!) but said I had an infection in the leg as well as the reaction to the essential oils. I got to go home on a bucket of meds and told to go to bed. And I did - because I didn't feel like doing anything else.
The 117th Texas State Convention of the United Daughters of the Confederacy was held in Houston October 4-6 at the Crowne Plaza Hotel. Although not fully recovered, I drove down, by myself, choosing to go through College Station because it was direct to the hotel. Had no problem. Got there in time to meet up with roommate, have dinner, head to the first evening function (Thursday evening). Enjoyed my time at convention, learned a lot, met a lot of folks -- including a distant cousin on Mother's side of the family. We had a nice time comparing research information. Next time Ken will be going because he is a member of the Sons of the Confederacy and he will be part of the color guard (he has a confederate uniform we had made for him recently). Ken will start color guard training in the next couple of weeks.
Leg had not improved...it got worse. Extreme edema, red streaks, but most of all, itchy red lesion patch about 3" in diameter. Hmm, what is this.
After return from Houston I became busy with activities at the Woman's Club (Woman's Shakespeare, UDC, DAR), and working on presentation of the book Free State of Jones: Mississippi's Longest Civil War, by Victoria Bynum. This book includes information about my paternal gggrandfather, Matt Kilgore, a former sheriff of Jones County, Mississippi. I was preparing the presentation for the November 6 meeting of the Julia Jackson #141 chapter of the UDC. However, I had a chance to present a practice run of it at the Griffith Camp of the Sons of Confederate Veterans the Saturday morning prior to the UDC meeting. Gave me a chance to tweak it a bit. I gave a successful presentation to the UDC - or at least no one threw shoes at me!
I was also elected Chair of the Julia Jackson #141 UDC nominating committee, along with fellow members Celia Brannon and Laura Wiese. We set to work rather quickly because there will be no meeting in January and we need to have the nominations ready to present at the Feb. meeting. We sent out emails canvassing membership (over 100 members) and very few responded they would take a position. We three met in early December and put our list together. We think we've done a good job. We hope so.
Ken and I were invited to a meeting of the Texas Navy (honorary admirals organization) at Diamond Oaks Country Club for a presentation by the chair of the history department at the University of North Texas on the subject of Italian grave stone sculptor _____________ (name escapes me at present). Having heard Dr. McCaslin previously on the subject of Robert E. Lee and George Washington, I knew we were in for an interesting evening. He did not disappoint. Glad we attended, enjoyed the evening, but found it rather pompus that each member introduced himself/herself as Admiral so and so and gave their date of appointment by the State of Texas and the official granting the appointment (such as Governor Perry). This is an "honor" organization, usually granted because of contribution to city/state/community.
I can't remember what day it was, but sometime in November or early December (brain cannot recall anything any more) I drove to Plano by myself and picked up a Singer 66 Redhead treadle sewing machine from fellow enthusiasts Allison Bayer. Can't believe I made it to Plano and back by myself...and the machine is gorgeous. Hopefully I'll get busy making a project on it shortly after the first of the year.
Ken had to work on Thanksgiving Day. He continues to work at the AT&T stadium (Dallas Cowboys). We are always alone on the holidays anyway so his working did not pose a problem, didn't interfere with any family gathering. I was working on oversize stockings for everyone in my family (meaning kids and grandkids) so used the time he was working to continue on that. I did prepare a roasted chicken with a bit of dressing, green beans, and sweet potatoes for when he arrived home from work - which was about 9 o'clock in the evening if not later. He ate and then promptly went to bed.
I spent the next two weeks sewing stockings - first quilting the fronts and backs, then adding cuffs to them all, and then putting on initials. I think they are cute. Daughter Brandi likes snowmen, so I had some cute fabric that I thought fit her; and for daughter Megan I always think of Rudolph and Christmas for her. She used to play Rudolph on the piano a lot. I had some reindeer fabric, so I made one of those for her. For son Chris I had a dark blue with bears (he used to talk about going big game hunting), and for each and everyone I tried to match up fabric with things about the individual. For little Sophie I put lace on the toe. I used fabric from my stash so I didn't spend money on Christmas fabric other than lining material and batting.
About the time of thanksgiving, or the week after, I got a message from great niece Katie asking me to help her with sewing rice warmer bags she wanted to give as Christmas gifts. She brought fabric and we had a fun afternoon with her operating the machine for the first bag. She got busy and couldn't make it back so I cut the remaining bags out and sewed them together and filled them with rice for her. She and Austin came one evening prior to Christmas and picked them up. I think there were 10 of them. She took them home and put monogram letters on them. And she managed to sell at least one of them. For $20!
I also made something for my daughters because there wasn't much money for buying gifts. I've made some things in the past but wasn't happy with the way they turned out so didn't give them to the girls. This year I liked what I made so have it wrapped and ready, along with some purchased gifts. Kinda goofy gift, but reversible apron made from Christmas fabric. I also monogrammed big initials on the front of them. I guess too corny for my daughters but I wanted so badly to give them something.
Leg still wasn't doing right. Got an appointment with my heart doc since the ER said to do that if the leg did not improve. I had a sonogram of the heart, a review of the doppler of my leg, a physical exam of the leg with explanation that what has happened is the veins are not working...not pumping the fluid back up out of the leg...collapsed veins due to many reasons...part of it due to varicose veins that happened long, long ago on a terrible day when I was very young. No point in delving into that story, ever. But the doc asked me point blank if something like it had happened and I did not lie. He also asked me if I had ever, in my entire life, had an MRI with contrast - and indeed I did...when I had the bone infection back in 2001 and 2002 and they amputated the back of my right foot and removed the heel. Still don't know what that has to do with the left leg. BUT, he is sending me to a vascular doctor, appointment on January 2, to see if anything can be done. In the meantime, I'm to keep the leg elevated. RIGHT!
We missed out on all but one Christmas party this year...weather was bad and everything was canceled. The Daughters of the American Revolution (Mary Isham Keith Chapter) where I am a member was going to honor my father-in-law as a WW II veteran. The luncheon was on December 7 at the Ridglea Country Club. But that was the weekend of the horrible ice storm and it was just way too bad to get Ken's 93 year old father out. And the meeting was canceled anyway. We also missed out on the SCV party for the same reason, and the Lockheed Blanketeer Christmas party was rescheduled to January 5. We made one party this year - the Julia Jackson #141 chapter of the UDC Christmas party and gift exchange. That's it. Otherwise it's been a bit dull!
I asked the girls for Christmas lists for the kiddos, and as soon as I got those we started shopping. There was a terrible long-lasting ice storm in Texas the first week, so I ordered quite a few things online. Unfortunately one order was lost, several could not be delivered. I ordered bedding for one granddaughter 3 different times. The week after the ice storm we made a trip to the store and found the bedding on the shelf an bought it, along with everything else that had not made it in an order to us. We were so excited for Christmas. This year we actually decorated the house, went hog wild. We were still at it on Christmas Eve...still trying to get packages wrapped, trying to clean house, trying to get ready. Daughter Brandi texted in the afternoon wanting to know if we were expecting them. I texted that we were not ready (I stank, needed a shower, house was not ready, gifts not wrapped, food not prepared), that I thought a day after Christmas would be better (I know they have other places to go on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and have Christmas at home that morning. I wasn't going to ask to interrupt plans. So she texted ok.
On Christmas Day we slept in, and about 10 a.m. opened gifts - mostly things we already knew about. Afterward we fixed our small Christmas meal of a tiny ham, baked sweet potatoes, and baked beans. Nothing fancy. Ken would have been happy with chicken and spaghetti. Then we settled in to watch some of the 67 episodes of Jeopardy we had recorded. I noticed the evening of the following day that Brandi had called sometime in the mid afternoon of Christmas Day. I sent a text telling her I had not seen the call. My phone stays in the back of the house and I rarely look at it. I thought everything was ok, but apparently it wasn't. Somehow between Christmas Eve and the end of Christmas Day everything went to hell. She was no longer speaking to me, would not respond to text messages or email, and I had (have) no idea what to do. I thought (stupid me) we would decide what would be a good day for them to come open gifts (we just can't load them and take them this year -- too much, too big), but apparently wires got crossed somewhere and now we're here with a house full of wrapped Christmas gifts that apparently are never going to be given to anyone. And I don't know what to do. I've more or less been told to shove it up my behind, told I'm jealous and manipulatve and she will not allow her children to be exposed to me. Well, I'm not jealous - there is nothing to be jealous of. I would like to see my children and grandchildren, without having to see my ex and his wife, but that has nothing to do with jealousy. It has to do with wanting time with my family - and they are not part of my family. But I'm going to talk to my counselor about it - maybe I'm not seeing something. As for manipulative, I don't see that one either. I haven't seen these kids in about 5 years so have no idea how I could manipulate them. But I'll talk to the counselor about that one, too. But I also think the kids need to examine themselves, because they, too, have got some serious problems. (I learned from a text message that I should have issued an invitation to come over to open gifts. Never entered my mind to do that. I come from a family where invitations to parents' homes, etc., is not needed. I never in my life waited for an invitation from my mother or brothers and neither did they. And my son doesn't wait for an invitation - he calls and says I'm coming. So do my nieces and nephews and the great nieces and nephews. That's called family. I figured they would tell me when a good time for them would be. Wow, the things I've learned in my old age.)
SO here we are, the end of 2013. And I don't have any idea what to do with the truck load of stuff in our den. God knows we have no place to store it, and a lot of it will be outgrown, not wanted in the future...and it won't fit in our cars for delivery.
That's about it...I need to find food. Just can't seem to eat when so confused.
As usual, love to all.
I went to the Cranky Treadlers Retreat in Lone Oak the weekend of 19-22 September. This is so much fun. I drove by myself this time - because I have to take so much stuff. Two machines - a Singer 99 handcrank and a Singer 66 Lotus handcrank. Plus luggage filled with cutting mats, fabric, projects, iron, tv tray for ironing pad, luggage with clothes and personal hygiene products, and food. This was a 4-day event, so needed quite a bit of "stuff."
The first day we spent setting up our individual nest areas, and then started in working on our various projects. I spent the first day sewing fence rail blocks together - I had made them at a previous retreat. It didn't take long for that. Then I started in making binding for the quilt I should have had finished months ago. I got that applied when I got home.
On the second day we loaded up in 3 cars and headed for Mineola to quilt shops. It was rainy, awful. We were about halfway there when a passenger in my car opened up vials of essential oils. Thought I was going to wreck the car...my throat started closing over, eyes started stinging, breathing became difficult. We made it through the quilt shops (one is very tiny but wonderful fabrics and prices) and then headed downtown to a place that has fabulous burgers/food. I had a wonderful steak sandwich - the biggest thing I've ever seen! (I took half of it back for supper!)
By the time we got back to the retreat center I was feeling terrible. And kept getting worse throughout retreat. I managed to stay until the morning of the 4th day and then packed it up and drove home. I managed to be home that night but Ken gave me a choice the 2nd day. He either called an ambulance to come get me or I could get in the car and he would take me to the ER. I let him take me. I was in anaphylactic reaction. Lucky me, while there the ER doc also noticed my left leg...red, inflamed, swollen. Said it looked like I had a blood clot. Oh joy! What else???? They did a doppler, found no blood clot (thank you!) but said I had an infection in the leg as well as the reaction to the essential oils. I got to go home on a bucket of meds and told to go to bed. And I did - because I didn't feel like doing anything else.
The 117th Texas State Convention of the United Daughters of the Confederacy was held in Houston October 4-6 at the Crowne Plaza Hotel. Although not fully recovered, I drove down, by myself, choosing to go through College Station because it was direct to the hotel. Had no problem. Got there in time to meet up with roommate, have dinner, head to the first evening function (Thursday evening). Enjoyed my time at convention, learned a lot, met a lot of folks -- including a distant cousin on Mother's side of the family. We had a nice time comparing research information. Next time Ken will be going because he is a member of the Sons of the Confederacy and he will be part of the color guard (he has a confederate uniform we had made for him recently). Ken will start color guard training in the next couple of weeks.
Leg had not improved...it got worse. Extreme edema, red streaks, but most of all, itchy red lesion patch about 3" in diameter. Hmm, what is this.
After return from Houston I became busy with activities at the Woman's Club (Woman's Shakespeare, UDC, DAR), and working on presentation of the book Free State of Jones: Mississippi's Longest Civil War, by Victoria Bynum. This book includes information about my paternal gggrandfather, Matt Kilgore, a former sheriff of Jones County, Mississippi. I was preparing the presentation for the November 6 meeting of the Julia Jackson #141 chapter of the UDC. However, I had a chance to present a practice run of it at the Griffith Camp of the Sons of Confederate Veterans the Saturday morning prior to the UDC meeting. Gave me a chance to tweak it a bit. I gave a successful presentation to the UDC - or at least no one threw shoes at me!
I was also elected Chair of the Julia Jackson #141 UDC nominating committee, along with fellow members Celia Brannon and Laura Wiese. We set to work rather quickly because there will be no meeting in January and we need to have the nominations ready to present at the Feb. meeting. We sent out emails canvassing membership (over 100 members) and very few responded they would take a position. We three met in early December and put our list together. We think we've done a good job. We hope so.
Ken and I were invited to a meeting of the Texas Navy (honorary admirals organization) at Diamond Oaks Country Club for a presentation by the chair of the history department at the University of North Texas on the subject of Italian grave stone sculptor _____________ (name escapes me at present). Having heard Dr. McCaslin previously on the subject of Robert E. Lee and George Washington, I knew we were in for an interesting evening. He did not disappoint. Glad we attended, enjoyed the evening, but found it rather pompus that each member introduced himself/herself as Admiral so and so and gave their date of appointment by the State of Texas and the official granting the appointment (such as Governor Perry). This is an "honor" organization, usually granted because of contribution to city/state/community.
I can't remember what day it was, but sometime in November or early December (brain cannot recall anything any more) I drove to Plano by myself and picked up a Singer 66 Redhead treadle sewing machine from fellow enthusiasts Allison Bayer. Can't believe I made it to Plano and back by myself...and the machine is gorgeous. Hopefully I'll get busy making a project on it shortly after the first of the year.
Ken had to work on Thanksgiving Day. He continues to work at the AT&T stadium (Dallas Cowboys). We are always alone on the holidays anyway so his working did not pose a problem, didn't interfere with any family gathering. I was working on oversize stockings for everyone in my family (meaning kids and grandkids) so used the time he was working to continue on that. I did prepare a roasted chicken with a bit of dressing, green beans, and sweet potatoes for when he arrived home from work - which was about 9 o'clock in the evening if not later. He ate and then promptly went to bed.
About the time of thanksgiving, or the week after, I got a message from great niece Katie asking me to help her with sewing rice warmer bags she wanted to give as Christmas gifts. She brought fabric and we had a fun afternoon with her operating the machine for the first bag. She got busy and couldn't make it back so I cut the remaining bags out and sewed them together and filled them with rice for her. She and Austin came one evening prior to Christmas and picked them up. I think there were 10 of them. She took them home and put monogram letters on them. And she managed to sell at least one of them. For $20!
Leg still wasn't doing right. Got an appointment with my heart doc since the ER said to do that if the leg did not improve. I had a sonogram of the heart, a review of the doppler of my leg, a physical exam of the leg with explanation that what has happened is the veins are not working...not pumping the fluid back up out of the leg...collapsed veins due to many reasons...part of it due to varicose veins that happened long, long ago on a terrible day when I was very young. No point in delving into that story, ever. But the doc asked me point blank if something like it had happened and I did not lie. He also asked me if I had ever, in my entire life, had an MRI with contrast - and indeed I did...when I had the bone infection back in 2001 and 2002 and they amputated the back of my right foot and removed the heel. Still don't know what that has to do with the left leg. BUT, he is sending me to a vascular doctor, appointment on January 2, to see if anything can be done. In the meantime, I'm to keep the leg elevated. RIGHT!
We missed out on all but one Christmas party this year...weather was bad and everything was canceled. The Daughters of the American Revolution (Mary Isham Keith Chapter) where I am a member was going to honor my father-in-law as a WW II veteran. The luncheon was on December 7 at the Ridglea Country Club. But that was the weekend of the horrible ice storm and it was just way too bad to get Ken's 93 year old father out. And the meeting was canceled anyway. We also missed out on the SCV party for the same reason, and the Lockheed Blanketeer Christmas party was rescheduled to January 5. We made one party this year - the Julia Jackson #141 chapter of the UDC Christmas party and gift exchange. That's it. Otherwise it's been a bit dull!
I asked the girls for Christmas lists for the kiddos, and as soon as I got those we started shopping. There was a terrible long-lasting ice storm in Texas the first week, so I ordered quite a few things online. Unfortunately one order was lost, several could not be delivered. I ordered bedding for one granddaughter 3 different times. The week after the ice storm we made a trip to the store and found the bedding on the shelf an bought it, along with everything else that had not made it in an order to us. We were so excited for Christmas. This year we actually decorated the house, went hog wild. We were still at it on Christmas Eve...still trying to get packages wrapped, trying to clean house, trying to get ready. Daughter Brandi texted in the afternoon wanting to know if we were expecting them. I texted that we were not ready (I stank, needed a shower, house was not ready, gifts not wrapped, food not prepared), that I thought a day after Christmas would be better (I know they have other places to go on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and have Christmas at home that morning. I wasn't going to ask to interrupt plans. So she texted ok.
On Christmas Day we slept in, and about 10 a.m. opened gifts - mostly things we already knew about. Afterward we fixed our small Christmas meal of a tiny ham, baked sweet potatoes, and baked beans. Nothing fancy. Ken would have been happy with chicken and spaghetti. Then we settled in to watch some of the 67 episodes of Jeopardy we had recorded. I noticed the evening of the following day that Brandi had called sometime in the mid afternoon of Christmas Day. I sent a text telling her I had not seen the call. My phone stays in the back of the house and I rarely look at it. I thought everything was ok, but apparently it wasn't. Somehow between Christmas Eve and the end of Christmas Day everything went to hell. She was no longer speaking to me, would not respond to text messages or email, and I had (have) no idea what to do. I thought (stupid me) we would decide what would be a good day for them to come open gifts (we just can't load them and take them this year -- too much, too big), but apparently wires got crossed somewhere and now we're here with a house full of wrapped Christmas gifts that apparently are never going to be given to anyone. And I don't know what to do. I've more or less been told to shove it up my behind, told I'm jealous and manipulatve and she will not allow her children to be exposed to me. Well, I'm not jealous - there is nothing to be jealous of. I would like to see my children and grandchildren, without having to see my ex and his wife, but that has nothing to do with jealousy. It has to do with wanting time with my family - and they are not part of my family. But I'm going to talk to my counselor about it - maybe I'm not seeing something. As for manipulative, I don't see that one either. I haven't seen these kids in about 5 years so have no idea how I could manipulate them. But I'll talk to the counselor about that one, too. But I also think the kids need to examine themselves, because they, too, have got some serious problems. (I learned from a text message that I should have issued an invitation to come over to open gifts. Never entered my mind to do that. I come from a family where invitations to parents' homes, etc., is not needed. I never in my life waited for an invitation from my mother or brothers and neither did they. And my son doesn't wait for an invitation - he calls and says I'm coming. So do my nieces and nephews and the great nieces and nephews. That's called family. I figured they would tell me when a good time for them would be. Wow, the things I've learned in my old age.)
SO here we are, the end of 2013. And I don't have any idea what to do with the truck load of stuff in our den. God knows we have no place to store it, and a lot of it will be outgrown, not wanted in the future...and it won't fit in our cars for delivery.
That's about it...I need to find food. Just can't seem to eat when so confused.
As usual, love to all.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)