Tuesday, November 6, 2012

2 ft tall walking doll

The picture is of my 2 ft tall walking doll.  She is so pretty.  I'm still searching for shoes/socks for her...I'm thinking I can get real children's shoes/socks to put on her.  Some of these were branded under well-known toy manufacturers, some were known as "grocery store" dolls and were unbranded (but often made by the same companies).  I keep telling myself I need to give them up but I like them too much to do that!

Readjusting to owning my days, not having to get up at 6 a.m.  It's marvelous!  Last Friday I had lunch with high school gal pals, and on Saturday we had a wonderfully lazy day.  Yesterday (Sunday) was so nice we just had to take advantage of it.  We loaded up the the doggies an dheaded out to Lipan.  We drove to Granbury and then thru Thorpe Springs.  Beautiful ride thru the fall landscape.

We stopped at the cemetery to say hello to Mother, Grandma, Papa, Aunt Florence, Uncle Chris, and cousin Kennie and allowed the fur babies to enjoy being out on the prairie a bit.  It is such a peaceful yet somehow extremely lonely place.  The family plot is at the curve of the little road and there is a pasture directly across from them.  The donkeys were all at the fence line braying and laughing, so that pretty much brings things into perspective!

After the cemetery we went to the main "town" of Lipan as usual and stopped at the combination store, gas station, eatery.  I selected a couple of diet cokes and a couple of snack items for Ken and myself as he was in the car with the babies.  Went to pay for my things and discovered my credit card was missing.  Had to pay with cash - and thank goodness I had some on me, because I rarely do!

On return to the car Ken helped me trace my steps back to the last time I used the card -- yep, at lunch with the girls on Friday!  Ken called the place and sure enough they still had the card.  So, after getting home and resting a bit we headed to Burleson to retrieve the card and eat dinner.  No point in wasting a stop at the Mexican Inn!  We shared an order of fajitas...lately ordering a meal for each of us is too much - we're getting old - can't eat as much as we used to!

Looking south toward main Crowley as we were on the backroads between FW and Crowley on our way to eat at Mexican Inn Monday evening

It was nice to spend Monday out and about and not running into the weekend traffic.

Today I had an appointment at 10:30 with my opthomologist (I KNOW that's not spelled correctly) - anyway, my eye specialist.  I have to go twice per year since I lost my sight completely way back in 2005/2006.  Everything is stable and I can actually see pretty good!  There's been a tiny bit of improvement in my left eye.  The right eye is still good.

Did you catch that the appointment was for 10:30?   The worry wart in this house woke me up at 7 a.m. - or at least tried - so I wouldn't be late!  Now what part of "I don't need to get up that early" does he not understand?  After all, I took my shower already, my hair is easy, I can't wear make up because they will be messing with my eyes/face, so it should take me a grand total of about 30 minutes to get my butt out the door.  And I knew I had gas in the car and didn't need to stop for it.  Considering it takes me about 30 minutes to get my butt downtown to Harris Hospital, I figure if I'm up by 9 I will get there!!!  Turns out HE had an appointment this morning and he wanted to be sure I was awake before he left.

I'm free for the remainder of the afternoon - so will have time to work on a quilt or something.  I think I may take one to the post office and get it mailed off....maybe.

This evening we have to be at the party for Charles (Chuck) Bradley by 6:30 to help celebrate or else cry in our beer over his campaign for U.S. Representative for District 33.  Sure hope he gets it.  He's a good guy with a good heart.  And of course everybody knows how I feel about the Presidential election!!!  I'm praying about that outcome.  Our country will not survive another 4 years under BO.

For now, I'm off of here.  I truly miss my students but they were about finished with their program/classes so we would have been parting ways anyway.  Since I have their email addresses maybe I can stay in touch with them that way.  I heard from one of them via email already.

So much for Tuesday...if anything interesting occurs later today I'll be sure to post it.

Friday, November 2, 2012

I'VE BEEN FIRED!  (lol)  YEA!!!

I was finally told yesterday (AFTER classes) that my instructor services will not be needed after this next week -- a full-time day instructor has been hired and will be onboard as of Monday, November 12.  The only thing that irritates the snot out of me about that is that the director did not have the balls to tell me the truth about it, choosing instead to tip toe around all week, avoiding me, keeping office doors closed when I was around (something she never does), etc.  I'm accustomed to dealing with professionals who are upfront/straight forward so didn't appreciate that.

My only regret is leaving the students.  I really bonded with them and they had told me they had learned so much from me - much more than from the other instructors.  But that's a whole 'nother story, and one of the reasons I'm glad I'm done.  That "non-profit organization" situation did not truly care whether or not the students learned anything.  It was strange.  I kinda figured out that the organization was just a business for the founder/director to support herself.  I think it was founded originally for the purpose of assisting women in learning job skills, but I think the focus was lost somewhere along the way.  In fact, on several occasions the director let me now I was spending far too much effort teaching the students...that she heard me actually READING the text from the manual to them, and that I was not supposed to be helping/coaching them thru the assignments.  Her philosophy regarding teaching is that the students need to struggle somewhat to do the assignments.  Well, my "philosophy" and my teacher training won't let me do that.  I was trained by educational professionals who teach that first you explain it to them, then you work through exercises with them, THEN you have them do the work on their own.  Otherwise, they don't learn.

Anyway, I AM SO RELIEVED!  After thinking about it for a short while (about 30 seconds), I made sure when I left yesterday that I took all personal stuff with me, left my instructor manual at the office (after cleaning out anything personal in it), and then when I left I sent a text to Ken telling him that I didn't want to return for next week.  I decided it wouldn't be in my best interest to hang around trying to teach classes this next week after I had been told I was no longer needed.  When I reached my car, from the parking lot of the non-profit I called one of my employment opportunities and accepted an offer.  I had been stalling, hoping to be able to work with my students until they finished the current classes, but decided I needed to end the situation...do what was best for ME.  I had actually written a letter of resignation two weeks previously, just had not submitted it.

SO, when I got home, after dinner, I sent a very nice "goodbye/so long" email to the director advising that I will not be back and that I have taken a position elsewhere and start on Monday.  BECAUSE I am actually a certified teacher for the local school district and they are driving me crazy trying to get me to sub.  Apparently this year they are having a difficult time getting subs because I looked today and there are at least 50 needed for today and no one accepted the assignments.  I chose not to start today, need a day off to recuperate, so I will start on Monday.  The good thing about working as a sub is I don't have to work every day - just need to work at least 2 days per week - 2 days of my choice - and I can select the assignments I want to take.  SO, last night I hook back up with the school system, indicated I am not available today (but have received 37 calls thus far looking for a sub!).  I will review assignments for Monday on Sunday evening and select one close to home and go teach a couple of days next week.  After that I will probably teach about 3 days per week - Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.  The problem with working for the schools is they pay once per month and the first pay day will not be until December 20...and that's only for work thru November 9.  Work after that thru sometime in December is paid in January.  Good thing we are not destitute!

That's the bad and good news of the day.  Now the problem is, I need to find my ISD badge!!!  I was previously carrying it around in my purse, but I took it out and put it somewhere safe.

Other than that, I'm meeting high school chums for lunch today, working on a quilt top, finishing up a quilt for a great niece, and living life.  Ken had an appointment this morning to be fitted with his new orthopedic shoes; he'll be back shortly and then probably be off with his buddies for the day.  This is a busy time - Ken's friend Chuck Bradley is the Republican candidate for U.S. Representative for District 33 so Ken "and the boys" have been busy putting out signs at early voting places, trying to get Chuck's name out to the general public, and drinking lots of coffee/tea and eating!  I pray that BO is not re-elected and that all democrats are knocked out of office!  I personally voted a straight Republican ticket.  Saw no point in looking at other candidates on the ballot.

Ok, off and runnng!  It feels so good to have the day off!!!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

I am cleaning up my sewing/computer/family research/everything room a little bit today because I can no longer work in the chaos.  I have no idea what I might have cleaned out sometime this year but I found a stack of stuff on my craft cutting/ironing table from 25-30 years ago.  Among the papers I discovered something I had written and forgotten.  It was composed as the result of a professor I had for a required literature class.  I will never forget the professor while at the same time never will I recall his name.  What I do remember about him is that the man could not be still -- he was constantly in motion, constantly moving, and not in normal ways!  His inability to be still was so distracting to the students that most of us would finally give up attempting to take notes and instead just stare in disbelief!  Below is what I wrote after one of the classes -- I had him for an evening class.

---------------------

THE DANCE OF LUNACY

It starts in a shrill voice that races across the waves so speedily that a Texan fails to hear, much less comprehend or hope to notate.  From there the head is thrown upward, and the eyes roll back under closed lids, not unlike a donkey as it begins to bray.  As the warm-up continues, the hands begin to gyrate in their separate circles - slowly at first - like the propellor on an old airplane; but gaining momentum and ever moving upwards and outward until the arms are engaged in the wide, vicious bands of motion.  Preparation for and actual takeoff lead to the full-body involvement in this self-directed dance of praise; the legs begin their side-to-side, to and fro, back and forth, frontward, backward, pivoting, round-and-round steps until the Texan can no more attend the subject of utterance.  The pen is still; the ears give up; the eyes are consumed by this mobile mass of energy, as it attempts to spew literacy upon the crowd.  And, then, the mass lights, fleetingly, upon the stool - first at rest, but alas, it cannot be still.  The lectern (or is that a podium?), much like a baton, must be moved up, down, around, over to the other side, back to home, and at last is left peacefully as the dance begins again.  

The Texan has lost strength watching the first movement, and is near to collapse as the second part begins - but alas, is obliged to remain until the end of the show.  Stumbling out into the night, the Texan begins to laugh uncontrollably, and is thus entertained through the late-night journey home. Merriment in retelling the event compels the Texan to record the legend.  

Future crowds must be warned!  Old ladies might faint, and elderly gents expire from sustained exposure.  Or, is this a tall Texas tale?  

---------------

When I was in my 20's I fancied myself a writer.  I submitted and had published several things, including a couple of short stories, some poems, and a few greeting card writings.  I still think I do a better job of greeting card writing than what is on/in most greeting cards I see!  

I wrote one "Harlequin Romance" type book in my late 20's.  I always thought that after I retired I would go back to writing.  It hasn't happened.  Hmm, maybe I should kick start myself!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Happy Birthday, Mother.  You would have been 91 today.  It has been almost eleven years since you left us and I still miss you.  I'm working on a quilt again - one for Michael's little girl, Presley.  Oh, Mother, you would adore her!  She is such a diva.  Anyway, I need you to help me with the quilt - it's not much fun working on them without you here to help me.  This one is pretty big...it's made from 2.5" strips of all things pink - looks like "Arizona Sunset."  It is so bulky and difficult to get through the machine.  All through the painful pushing and shoving it thru the machine I was wishing you were here.  You used to hold the quilts for me so the weight didn't pull and tug on the machine or me, and I miss you helping me guide all that bulk through the arm of the machine.  Anyway, hope you had a marvelous birthday.  Tell Grandma, Aunt Lona, Uncle Rex, Aunt Florence, Uncle Marvin, Uncle D, Uncle Chris, Uncle Tommy, and Uncle Charles hello and give hugs to everybody.  Tell Papa I'm looking forward to seeing him as well.  And if Daddy is there, and if you see him, tell him hello for me.  No, I don't expect you to give him a hug!! (lol)

This past week has been SO dang hard.  Our spaniel Maggie has been steadily going downhill healthwise.  She got really bad last week and we had to take her to the vet on Thursday.  He gave her some meds for the Cushings disease (liver) and the arthritis.  Instead of it helping her, she had a terrible weekend.  She got down so bad she couldn't get up again - couldn't walk any more.  We thought we were going to lose her last night, but she held on until and through today.  This evening at about 5 o'clock we had her at the vet and we said our final goodbyes to her.  Mother, be looking for her at the rainbow bridge.  She will be the prettiest, sweetest black cocker spaniel there.  She'll be sniffing the flowers - she loves the garden - and she'll be making her way around all the various places.  But then she'll be looking for Daddy and Mommy and we won't be there.  Please take care of her for us.  And by the way, how is Murphy doing?  He will love Maggie - everybody does.  I still miss him very much.  I still have his collar and tags and his leash.  I don't let anyone else use his leash.  The same will be true for Maggie's collar and leash.

You didn't meet Maggie before you went away.  After we lost you unexpectedly in December of 2001, then Daddy in February of 2002, then Murphy Joe in November of 2002, I just about grieved myself to death, too.  That was during the time I was fighting the horrible bone infection, was allowed out of the hospital to attend your funeral and Daddy's, then back in the hospital for all that time.  I was home on recuperation after all of that and before the next hospital go 'round when Murphy died of west nile.  Ken talked me into trying to find another baby because I needed something to hang on to.  We found Maggie at the Humane Society - actually she found Ken.  She jumped into his arms out of that cage the instant it was opened and never let him go.  We had no choice but to bring her home with us that day.  She's been a great companion all this time.  But she was struggling and we had to make the final decision today.  So now she needs you to look out for her (Note: Maggie is terribly afraid of thunderstorms and other loud noises, but she loves the rain.  And she loves to roll in the grass after it's been mowed.  But most of all, Maggie needs to be close to the people she loves.  She has anxiety attacks when she's anywhere except at home with her "people" unless it's on the motorhome or she's out walking with Daddy.  Otherwise she cries to go home.  I think she'll run toward you because I think she'll know who you are.)

I had an interview today - for a job where I am currently employed as a part-time temporary instructor.  I don't think I'll get the job...they told me they have interviewed several others and are expecting to call back at least two of them for second interviews.  I think they interviewed me as a courtesy since I've been doing the job for them since their curriculum coordinator became ill in August and passed away week before last.  Don't ask me why they don't want me - I have no idea.  They keep telling me I'm doing a good job with the classes.

Guess that's about it for now.  I'm tired.  It's been a stressful Monday.  I miss you so much - wish you had a telephone.  I know you're pretty busy talking with everyone, and I hope to see you in the future but I'm not quite ready to turn loose here.  I'm hoping some day to get to see my own children and grandchildren again, but for now I'm still non-existent in their world.

Love you - bye for now.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Been awake since about 4:30 -- another nightmare involving my children so woke up screaming.  Not sure how much longer I can endure the nightmares.  They seem to be getting worse.  I know it's the meds, and the meds are not going to change, but this is getting intolerable.

Stress level is high.  I told Ken back a few months ago that if I had to give up retirement (which I have earned, he hasn't), that it was not going to be a good thing for him.  Sure enough, instead of HIM working, I am.  And while I am doing something I've always wanted to do (teach and work with underprivileged women), I'm not going to do this and support his non-working ass.  I've been supporting him and dealing with the financial mess he made when he decided to commit suicide in February of 2009 and ruined me in the process.  I should be the one at home enjoying my retirement years, playing with my sewing machines and doing whatever I want to, but instead I'm out earning the extra dollars.  Every time I look at him I get pissed off about it.  And then he has the audacity during the day to send me text messages about, "I'm going to lunch with Chuck and Dave."  "I'm meeting Chuck and Dave for coffee."  Screw Chuck and Dave -- get your ass out and find a job.

Granted, Ken gets a disability check, but his check barely covers his personal BS - car payment, auto insurance, health insurance (supplemental to Medicare), his personal expenses (gas, toiletries, attorney/court fees), his payment on the loan he took out back in 2008 that I knew nothing about, and his prescriptions.  It pays nothing toward living expenses so he has been a parasite on me since 2009.  

Whew, I feel better since I vented on that subject!!!  Wonder what the heck else is bothering me!!!

Had a new class start on Monday -- another one of those classes where a couple of them have NO business being in the class!!!  OMG!  Where do these people come from????  I don't understand counselors who are referring them to the classes!  These are sweet ladies, and I believe everyone has capabilities of some kind, but not everyone belongs in a keyboarding or computer class.  Hopefully this will become a better class than I am anticipating.

The morning class I took over is not doing well at all.  They have been in keyboarding for 2 hours per day for 11 sessions and only two of them can type.  I'm not sure what to do with them, but I am going to talk to my superiors about this class this morning.  Again, they are sweet ladies, but they need to be able to type before we move into Word.  We started Word yesterday and one of the first things we do each lesson is a keyboarding exercise - typing paragraphs and eventually whole pages.  I had them print them off so I could check/grade them.  They are pitiful.  We need to start their typing class over.  This is probably not their fault.  This class started with the other instructor who became so ill (cancer), was taught hit and miss by our founder/director, and has now been taken over by me.  I am their first regular instructor.  I think they could benefit from re-doing the keyboarding module.  That is going to be my suggestion today.  

Haven't had time to stop to smell the roses lately.  Thankfully I'm off on Fridays right now so it gives me a bit of time to recuperate.  Right now I guess I better shower and go to work.  Of course has decided to go into the bathroom to do his business right at the time I need to take a shower, so I won't be able to get in there for another half hour.  And now he has decided to take a shower!  WHY?  So he'll be clean when he goes to lunch with Chuck and Dave 4-5 hours from now?  GRRRR!!!

Oh, well, at least it's Wednesday.  

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Happy/exciting/sad week. My first computer class completed yesterday with students taking their big final 3-part test. They all passed, although they were all nervous about taking it. It was exciting for them and I was sad to see them go. I will never forget them - the ones who actually finished the 7 week program worked very hard, were there all the time, and there was a great bond formed. I took them out for lunch today (they invited me to go with them and I surprised them by buying their lunch).

 I am hacked with Texas Workforce Commission because I started asking 3 weeks ago about the computers promised to my students and haven't heard a word about them yet. Naturally the students don't trust TX Workforce and don't believe they will ever get them. I tend to agree with them.

This morning I took over a morning class. This class began a couple of weeks ago, being taught by the other paid day teacher who is now out due to the huge mass that was found on her liver. She is still in the hospital and chemo is being shot straight to the mass in hope it will kill it. Our founder and executive director has been teaching the morning class in the teacher's absence, but asked me to take it over as she does not have the time to do it. So, guess I'll continue working for a while.

In addition, I have a new class starting on Monday afternoon from 1-3. This class would also be taught by the other teacher under ordinary circumstances. If/when the teacher returns to work she will take over the class if we are not finished before then. Our organization will have other classes starting with Texas Workforce - target date is October 15. I'm supposed to teach those - we'll see what happens, because we also have another class starting at our facility on October 22! We gotta get another instructor!

Oh, today I got to review the class/teacher assessments the students completed. The class and I received glowing reviews except as provided by one student, and hers were downright mean (honest?). This was my student who interrupted me no matter who I was speaking to, didn't care what I was trying to teach, became impatient because other class members asked questions or needed additional explanation about how to do something, etc. Anyway, I have to let her comments/review roll off my back. It's just that she works with the wife of my former boss and I don't want them thinking I'm an idiot; I'm sure she has been telling my former boss' wife that I am.

So, with that I guess I'll let it go and get on with the next classes. I learned a lot, and quite frankly endured a lot that I won't put up with in the future - and I've made that clear to the boss. Life goes on.

 Miss my children - constant refrain that will never end. Think about them every moment of every day as I have since the day I learned they were on the way. That also means I miss the grandchildren, because they are a part of my children.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

A fairly good day. Class was good. A student who missed most of last week and was out again yesterday came back to class today. Hopefully it will be possible to learn the material and make up the work...I don't have the time to teach a one-on-one class. Another student who has been out week before last as well as last week and this is supposedly going to be in class tomorrow. Some way I have got to control the class so that these two are not working on make up work during class. The lady in charge of instructors and curriculum advised me to have everyone turn off their monitors while we are doing the lesson. I believe that is what I will do.

Afternoon class is going well since a couple of students dropped. Amazing how just one or two students can interrupt the class. We've been able to get so much more done since these two dropped.

We are in the last days of the program. Surprising how much they have learned in just six weeks. They will finish next week (BIG test). I don't know yet when they will get their cute little notebook computers, but it won't be long. Class graduation should take place in October some time.

So, what else? I made a HUGE "taco" salad last night -- the recipe some of us used to make back in the early 70's for church parties. It has a pound of browned ground beef, diced chicken (I buy the already cooked fajita chicken), tomato, onion, a can of Ranch Style beans drained and rinsed, a bag of salad (lettuce, carrots, radishes, mix), crushed fritos, and seasonings -- chili powder, salt/pepper, and garlic powder. It is all mixed up with Catalina dressing added a bit at a time so it is not "drowning." We had it for dinner last night and I took more for lunch today. Yummy. Gives me the extra protein they want me to have plus isn't really all that bad for me.

Other than that -- my identity has been stolen. Credit cards have been taken out in my name, plus whoever has attempted to open a Bill Me Later financial account via WebBank. Fortunately WebBank rejected the request because of "incomplete information or inaccurate information or the circumstances may have suggested that the purchase was not made by you." I've been busy contacting the various companies, the credit bureaus, and have made a police report. Suppossedly there will be an investigation by the credit card companies and they will supply me with the information of who did this and I can then prosecute them. Pain in the behind. We are watching our bank account closely and have alerts out at all three credit bureaus via phone plus today Ken mailed letters to each of them. Hopefully we're covered.

Oh, we saw my cousin's son and his little boy on Sunday. We had a sewing machine to give to his wife so we met up with the two at my place of business for delivery. First time we've seen the little boy since reunion a couple of years ago. A real sweetie.

That's about it. I've got papers to review and grade in preparation for class tomorrow...getting close to end so have to get averages figured out. I'll go in for a while this weekend to get that done.

Take care...